when the cup feels over-filled instead of overflowing
(These were some thoughts that came to mind one night when I couldn't sleep and I felt like God wanted me to flesh them out, answer them and share, so I pray that they encourage someone somewhere!)
When the cup feels over-filled instead of overflowing
Have to hides get to
Want to becomes should have done
Dreams never become realities
Blessings feel like burdens
The now is lost in future plans
The full arms feel tired and weak
The young years of my children can feel like the lost years for me
But they feel like the Big years for them
We bring the Big
The Big love
The Big lessons
The Big praise
The Big punishments
The Big hugs
The Big memories
The Big feels so heavy on our life As we labor forward in this huge endeavor called parenting
The cup that overflows with blessings can feel stuck in the state of overfilled and life feels paralyzed and paused, unable to perform as it should.
How do you move forward?
Change course for your thoughts?
Forge a new path?
Although I didn't set a new goal of writing more or anything because I usually just get overwhelmed by goals instead of inspired, I am grateful for this topic that was brought to my mind the other night when I couldn't sleep. I acknowledge openly my struggle with anxiety and I have been learning more about its origins and manifestations in my life all the time through my friendships, relationships and counseling (Thank you Lord for counseling, amen!)- all of that to say, I want to just mention that this does influence how I interact with the world and I am realizing not everyone feels or experiences things in the same way.
Many are probably familiar with the phrase or verse reference "my cup runneth over," or the idea that blessings abound. Our "cup" or life/spirit is full, and more, from God's good gifts. I am so grateful for all that he has done in my life and the abundant life he gives, but I often feel like my "overflowing" cup feels "over-filled" and I am inadequately handling all that I have been bestowed. I feel guilty when I acknowledge that my blessings feel like burdens.
Not every time do I feel like their is a set resolution or solution to our struggles. Sometimes there is just a hard time and season and we don't have to find the answer, but hopefully we have a community to share the load, physically, spiritually or emotionally.
I want to offer a few suggestions that have helped me transform my perspective when I may be stuck in a rut of overwhelm and hope they can spur a thought for your life in someway too. Share yours in the comments too, I would love to hear them:
1) Find some Scripture strongholds and mantras to repeat back to yourself when you are feeling inadequate or overwhelmed by life. Print them off, write them down and put them where they can reach you when you are down. Help your future self out when you are having a good day and prepare for the hard moments.
2) Have a safe friend or family member you can reach out to if you are feeling these ways so you can share what's going on. Don't expect them to fix it, maybe just ask them just to listen and not offer a solution, but sharing is an important part of mental health. Pray for them and that God would equip someone in your life to respond to you in love and discernment for when they need to listen and when they need to speak truth into your life.
3) Seek out a counselor- there are ways to have counseling paid for through churches occasionally or other resources. Find a way to make it work if you can and are ready. It is life-changing.
4) Join a community of others who provide accountability for you when you don't want it always. Maybe its a group at church, a workout group, a mom's group. Get people in your life who are looking out for you and reaching out when you may be tempted to withdraw or shut people out.
5) Establish a routine of self-care. This may sound intimidating or too big to you- I get it. It does not have to be elaborate at all. Look in your day for pockets of attainable time for yourself. Think about what brings you life, connects you with God and/or makes you feel like you, even for a few minutes. (reading, podcasts, workouts, art, crafting, etc.)
6) Look at what is true right in front of you. Talk through the lies and beliefs in your mind- writing them out is helpful, so you can pinpoint what lies you may be believing. This is a concept I received when I went through a "Recovery for Life" program and it is just so helpful for eradicating the harmful lies that can be used against us in our minds and relationships.
7) God for a drive and listen to music that speaks to you-either moves your mind, your body or your spirit. I like to listen to classical piano when I need to calm my mind; reggae or pop when I want to dance and contemporary christian when I need to worship. Totally not the same for each person but this is what works for me.
8) Just cry. Let out the tears and feel no shame or guilt that it feels hard. It is hard. Life is hard in a million ways sometimes.
9) Take a social media break. Remind yourself of how fleeting a moment that is captured by a camera is- and the before and afters of pictures in your own life. Nothing and no one is perfect. Period. Give your mind and heart a break from the trap that come from the black hole of scrolling.
10) Journaling- perhaps in a journal that gifts you prompts if you feel like you need some help. I really appreciate the Cultivate What Matters journals - they provide a scripture for you to read and write out and a spot to share some thoughts on your heart.
Let me know what you do when you need a break or a reconnect time!